Jackie Stewart

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Me Mudder

When me prayers were poorly said
Who tucked me in me widdle bed
And spanked me till me butt was red

Me Mudder

Who took me from me cozy cot
And put me on the ice cold pot
And made me pee even If could not

Me Mudder

And when the morning light would come
And in me crib me dribbled some
Who wiped me tiny widdle bun

Me Mudder

Who would me hair so neatly part
And hug me gently to her heart
Who sometimes squeezed me till me fart

Me Mudder

Who looked at me with eyebrows knit
And nearly have a king size fit
When in me Sunday pants me shit

Me Mudder

When at night her bed did squeak
Me raised me head to have a peak
Who yelled at me to go to sleep

Me Fadder!